To The Entrepreneur Whose Family Thinks You Are a Failure: I See You

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My parents are the immigrant success story prototype. They come from the poorest country in the western hemisphere and have managed to put 4 kids through college and graduate school.  And while they are far from rich or even well-off, they allow my husband and I to rent out their vacant apartment as I can continue to grow my business as a content creator.

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But they don’t understand entrepreneursism, not even a little bit, While they have never described me as a disappointment or the word “failure,” I can feel it in all of our interactions.

Just last week, for instance, I had the following exchange with mother:

Me: Hey Mom! This brand is flying me to such and such place. Covering all travel and meals.
Mom: Yeah. Are they paying you?
Me: No mom, it’s a press trip.
Mom: hmph.

Real talk? Her reaction hurt my feelings. But then I had to remind myself that I need to be grateful she hasn’t thrown my ass out on the street! And, listen, who can blame her? Every parent wants to see their child standing on their own two feet. They worked hard to ensure that I would not be in the position I am today, yet here I am: On the entrepreneurial struggle bus, by choice. For my parents, it’s a slap in the face. For me, it’s a journey that I must see through.

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When your people doubt you it can be soul-crushing. Being in my 30s and still, a source of worry for my parents ain’t exactly where I envisioned myself, either. While my readers validate me every single day, my mother’s worrying glances cause me to question myself regularly. But I’d like to think all of these challenges help to shape my narrative as a truly self-made woman. While I haven’t made it yet, when I do, I’ll be able to truthfully say I did so without having many people in my real life think that I could. I don’t use their doubt as a motivator, either. Thankfully, I have an impeccable work ethic, so their lack of support doesn’t fuel my desire for success. Indeed,  folks who are driven by a need to prove themselves can easily fall victim to needing constant validation to push through.  I don’t want to ever rely on you, my family or anyone else to feel good about myself.

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So to the  Entrepreneur Whose Family Thinks You Are a Failure, I see you. Push through. Their lack of support will be a part of your story,  and nobody’s story has been paved with a bed of thorn-free roses, believe me! You can and will do this, with or without their involvement. Remember why you started and allow that to fuel you.

PIN IT!

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Have you ever felt that your family doesn’t support you? How do you cope with it? Sound off below!

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2 Comments

  1. stephanie mathis says:

    I can understand how you feel. I am the youngest of four girls and I kept my parents worried about me. I couldn’t stay committed to anything as far as college and jobs, then I had the nerve to get married. LOL! Three years after I got married, I lost both of my parents to cancer. It took a long time for my husband and I to get our sh*t together (financially) but we stuck it out and I think my parents would be proud to see us still together (25 years and counting). I eventually did get a college degree, we’re trying to buy our first home, got money in savings, 401k’s (grown folk sh*t). I also want to comment that we sometimes project our feelings onto our parents. I remember one day out of the blue that my mother told me she was proud of me. I was shocked because I had felt like I WAS a failure. Just stick it out because you will get where you desire to be.

  2. Lisa, thank you for being so candid. Although you are successful now, you are going to be even more so because of your willingness to share. My husband’s parents are immigrants as well and sometimes they just don’t get him and his entrepreneurial spirit. I’m a firm believer that God gives your dream to you and only you. It’s our responsibility to follow through. Sending peace, love and continual success your way!

    All the best,
    Angel

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